Been enjoying the past few days
But is it at your expense?
I can't help but beat my self up
over something I'm afraid will happen.
the fact that I could prevent this.
knowing I'm not trying to.
-Makes me feel like a terrible person.
It's between:
Cutting ties now and saving the pain.
Or letting things go,
putting you at risk of a broken heart.
I don't want to be the one to blame.
I don't want to become the one you hate.
You are beginning to mean a lot;
I do think about you throughout the day.
and I do look forward to seeing you again.
Talking to you throughout the night.
But i know it's not the same.
It kills me to watch you hope for this
not knowing how things are going to go;
And quite frankly;
It Terrifies me.
But you know what hurts the most?
Devoting my time to getting close with someone
who could quit possibly neglect me
if I can't bring myself to feel the same.
If i take the time to get close with you,
I don't plan for a specific relationship
I just cherish the closeness I built over time.
Maybe this is wrong.
Maybe I'm a freak?
-Mar.
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